So Blessed

I can't help but feel so blessed when I think about the last couple of years.  It has definitely been the most difficult years in both mine and Curtis's lives but at the same the most rewarding in ways.  I don't always feel like it is such a blessing though.  So I thought I would blog so I can remember the blessings when I am full of unwanted self pity. I look back and I can now see so many miracles that I didn't think anything of then.  I was working when I had a sudden urge to do Foster care.  I never wanted to do foster care before because I saw what my sisters went through with it and I didn't want that for me.  Well my mind changed and we started to do it.  I was able to quit my job and be a stay at home mom.  I also had the urge to start making bread and play dough.  For those of you who know me well you probably know I hate to cook, so this was strange.  I had also been trying to get pregnant for a long time before Cove.  I kept getting pregnant and miscarrying.  Now looking back I realize God's hand in it all.  If I would have gotten pregnant when I wanted I would have had a newborn baby right when Ivy was diagnosed with Celiac disease.  If it wasn't for the sudden urge to make bread I wouldn't have dared to even try  to make anything Gluten Free for Ivy.  If it wasn't for my suddenly wanting to do foster care I would have been working and everyone would have been stressed trying to figure out how to feed Ivy and I would have been stressed wondering what Ivy was eating while I was at work.  Then right before I found out about my brain lesions Curtis and I decide it's time to move to town closer to family.  We decided that we would take a loss every month and just rent some place cheap.  As soon as we moved in we found out about the lesions.  If it wasn't for the move, there is no way that family would have been able to help out as much with the kids and things during my medical stuff. Then right before or right after Cove turned 1 he started to get sick we already had him on a GF diet so we were confused as to why he was sick. We took him to the doctor and found out that he has IGA Deficiency and some other health problems.  We also started giving him wheat so we could get him tested.  It was obvious that it was making him way sick but he came up negative for Celiac Disease.  The doctor didn't think he had it even though it was making him sick because it didn't show up on the test.  I later found out that the IGA deficiency messes up the celiac test.  I feel so blessed that Ivy had already been Gluten Free and Diagnosed or we would have never known that Cove had celiac too.  So he would have just been really sick and nobody would have been able to help him.  Recently we had a health scare with River. It is still kind of going on but I can't wait to look back on this and realize how much we are being blessed in this. (other than knowing for sure that we are not having more kids LOL).It is just crazy that all of that was happening and while it was happening I didn't even know I was getting handed miracle after miracle. Later in blessings I have received I was told that "angels" and "heavenly hosts" had been assisting me.  I just love that.  I can see so clearly now heavenly father's hand in all things.  I feel so blessed that he sends help to me because trust me there is no way I did the past 2 years alone.  Sometimes I think that I can't do this life, it is to hard.  Then I remember my blessings and that I am never alone. When I forget, God sends me a message. Tonight it was Heidi's and Danielle's posts.  I feel so burdened and equally blessed.  Now Heavenly Father is blessing us "beyond belief" with our new home and the support of parents and siblings.  I am so overwhelmed in every way.  I need to remember.